Whispers of A Former Life
by lotrox
Summary: One Shot. JPLE. A little ficlet of a few touching moments between Harry's birth and the Potters' Death.


Just a short One-Shot coz I wanted to write something. I'm still here, still alive lol. I don't know how I got this little ficlet in my head but it's here.

Enjoy

Whisper

"Oh My," James stared down at the child cradled in his wife's arms, "My…"

His wife, Lily looked up at him, and there was just so much happiness reflected in her eyes that it made him want to cry.

_We don't deserve such happiness. Not now. Not with so many people dying. Yet here it is, sitting in her arms. _

His eyes were wet as she held out his son to him. His hands trembled and he took the tiny weight and held it awkwardly in his arms. He bent his head down low over the child and stared into his green eyes, so like his mother's.

"I'll take care of you," he murmured, "you're my baby, and I want you to feel safe. Forever. I'll protect you until you're big and strong, and even then I'll still look after you. Because you are what is bright in these dark times. You will lead the world on, away from the mistakes we may have made, and will sort out this mess we have made of the world." He closed his eyes and pressed a kiss on the baby's head. He then looked up at his wife.

"I don't deserve this," he said, "you were always right; I was always immature and selfish. Yet you still did this for me."

"You grew James," was all she said. She closed her eyes and lay back down. Exhausted. The nurse ran over to her and began fussing. James refused to let go of the baby, cradling it in his arms. He pressed a kiss to Lily's lips and walked out of the room, to show his first child to his friends.

------------------------------------------------------------------

"James?"

They were tentative, not sure what to say or do. All three of them were there. His friends, his brothers. Sirius, Remus, Peter. Always together. War and death could not separate them. They were joined. The Marauders.

He grinned, his solemnity leaving him as he held out his son. "You got yourself a godson Sirius," he grinned. Sirius smiled happily, "good, I hoped you wouldn't have a daughter. Girls are no fun. When you have a daughter she can be Remus'." He smiled to show he was joking and gazed down at the baby.

"Go on Sirius, hold him," James said, "he's not a glass ornament to be admired from a distance."

Sirius took him with a grin, "he's so small!" He exclaimed, "I'm going to spoil this little brat rotten," he decided, "That's what's best about being a godfather: you can have favourites!"

"How's Lily, James?" Asked Remus, always polite and caring.

"Asleep. She's tired."

"I'm not surprised."

"Do you have a name yet?" This was the first time Peter had spoken, he had just been staring down at the child in silence, in awe.

"Not yet. Lily will think of something I guess. Whatever it is, it's got to be better than her sister's son's name. What parent would call their son Dudley? Seriously? I couldn't stop laughing when Lily told me."

"So Prongs, you're a Father now!" Sirius spoke up, "who'd have thought it? What'll you be: Father, dada, dad, or daddy?"

------------------------------------------------------------------

"I like Cameron."

"Isn't that a girl's name?"

"No. I think it's unisex."

"It's a girl's name Lils."

"No. Boys can be called Cameron, James. When I was at Muggle School, the boy I had a crush on was called Cameron."

"Well then definitely not."

"Oh James! You can't be jealous of a crush over eleven years old."

"Not Cameron!"

"It's a pretty name."

"Well, when we get a daughter we can call Her Cameron!"

"Well then Mr genius, what would YOU suggest?"

"I dunno. I'm not a name person. I named my owl at school 'tweetie' for Christ's sake. Owls don't even tweet!"

"What does he look like?"

"The owl? He's dead."

"No James. I meant your son," said through gritted teeth, "I don't care about your old shabby owl."

They both stared down at the week-old baby.

"Cameron," said Lily. "Cameron James Potter."

"Well we can keep James," said James, "but the girl's name can go. He'd get teased something dreadful at school."

"No-one would be that cruel: to be nasty to someone because of their name."

"I would," James said, then shook his head and raised his arms as Lily glared at him, "Whatever. Anything, but please not Cameron!"

"Fine. How about James Jr," Lily said with heavy sarcasm.

"I like that!" James exclaimed jumping up.

"no James, sit down before you do some damage."

"I could ask Sirius…" James began

"Absolutely not," Lily said, "he is just as bad as you are."

"How about a cool name. Like… Jack. Isn't that supposed to be modern? Modern equals cool!"

"Jack? James seriously, does he look like a Jack?"

James looked, "well he doesn't really look like anything." He ducked Lily's arm as she reached up to slap him, grabbed the baby and held him aloft.

"One step and the baby gets it!" He said. Lily slapped him anyway.

"Ouch! Why you little…"

"How about we name him after your Grandfather?" Lily interrupted, "I know you were fond of him."

"Wilfred? You gotta be kidding me?"

"Thierry?"

"Isn't that French?"

"Jarvis?"

"No."

"Seth? Saul? Octavian? Anton?"

"No, no, no! Stop trying weird names that no-one likes. Just a name Lily, it's not that difficult. Something nice and plain that can be said and remembered and is English! Like Richard, or Harry."

"Harry?"

"Well, not Harry, obviously my choice of names isn't good, we've already established that, but you get the idea."

"No James; I like it."

----------------------------------------------------------------------

"Happy Birthday Harry!" Lily pressed a kiss to the one year old's nose and his giggled, and reached up to grab on to her long red locks. She evaded his fingers with practiced experience and presented him with his birthday cake. It had one candle on it, which she lit with a tap from her wand.

"A year ago today," she said, "whoo, seems like yesterday. Stop that!" She slapped Sirius' hand away that was edging towards the cake.

"Aw Ma'm, just a bit of icing. I'm hungry!"

"He's got to blow the candle out,"

"Like he's going to do that," Sirius grumbled, "doesn't even know what's going on, I want my dinner!"

"Here Harry," Lily bent over he son and mimed blowing, "blow out the candle sweetie, that's it." Harry just laughed and tugged at a strand of hair.

She gave a fond smile, "let mummy do that then," she said and blew out the candle. "I made a wish for you darling. But Mustn't tell anyone or it won't come true."

She looked up and her eyes caught James'. They looked into each other's eyes for several moments, he sitting opposite her, her bending over her son.

_Moments like this can last a life time, just one moment can last forever. Make the most of what we've got_

"Touching scene though this is," Sirius broke the moment of poignancy with his usual lack of tact, "the candle is out and the icing is calling my name."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"What is it that you want more than anything else Lily?" His eyes were wet, but he was not crying. His arms were shaking as he gripped Lily be the elbows, as she was sobbing loudly into her hands.

"I want a life where my son can grow up without war and hatred," she sobbed, "I want all the death and violence to end."

_I would give you the world. And yet you ask me for something I cannot give _

"Lily…"

She flung herself at him and wrapped her arms round him, tight tight. Head buried into his chest as tears flowed from her eyes.

"I want…" she choked, "I want…"

_A Chair by the fireplace, a dog by my feet, _

_My son in his cradle, happy in his seat, _

_My husband beside me, not fighting for his life, _

_The man who I married to come home to his wife. _

_-------------------------_

_The fighting to stop, the wars to end, _

_The cuts to heal, the wounds to mend, _

_The good men triumph, the bad to die, _

_Why won't this happen? Oh why? _

_------------------------_

_I want a world with joy where I can lie _

_Safe in peace where no-one can cry,_

_A place to settle down, happy in my bed. _

_But this happy place lives only in my head_

"I want to be there for him. For you. I want to live to see my son grow. I don't want to leave him alone. I want him to know who I am."

He cried too then, and held his wife close.

"That will happen Lily, one day. One day all that you wish for will happen."

_I promise _

She shook her head and cried some more.

"We just have to go through with this okay. Stick together. Do what's best for our son. This is what's the best. Until it's over. That way we can both be there for him."

"James," she sobbed, "promise me that you'll be there. Always. Even after I die. Promise me."

_I promise _

"You won't die Lily. You'll die old. You're children will know you and love you. I would die before I let you die."

"No!" she exclaimed, "No. You must stay. For Harry."

She collapsed again into his arms.

"I would die for Harry."

"No James. Don't die for him. Live for him."

"I will do anything."

_Anything… within the realm of possibility… not even the invincible James Potter can do the impossible _

"Promise me…" she sobbed, "Promise me…"

"What Lily? Promise what?"

She shook her head. There were no promises that he could make. Not now.

_I know what you would wish for Lily. I know what you want me to promise you. You want me to tell you that everything will be okay. I can't say that. It is what I want to say, what I want to believe, but I can't promise it. Love and War has no happy endings. Only what small joys we can make of them. _

"Do you trust me Lily? Do you trust me enough to let me do this? Not Dumbledore, not Sirius but Peter. Do you trust that I've got this right?"

_I can't make promises Lily _

She looked up him, eyes damp, cheeks streaming with shed tears, mouth trembling. Somehow she managed to recover enough to say:

"I love you James."

_That's all you ever need to say. _

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_No James don't die for him. Live for him. _

Her words echoed in his mind as the door blew open.

_The marauders. Always one. Always together. Forever. _

Forever wasn't that long was it Peter?

Red eyes gleamed as the cloaked figure advanced

_Promise me James… Promise me? _

I can't promise Lily. I don't know what will happen.

"James Potter. At my mercy. Well, well. What should I do with you?"

_We are brothers. The Marauders. No matter what, we will always be as one. _

Always, Peter?

"I am going to kill you James. You, and your son. I will be merciful James. I will kill you first."

_I love you James. _

Lily. I love you more that life and death itself. Love triumphs over everything.

"I might spare your wife but do not get hopeful. Hope is for fools."

_Hey James! _

Sirius

_What do you do if an Avada is hurled at you? _

I don't know Sirius. What do you do if an Avada is hurled at you?

_You duck! _

_Sirius grinned. _

It was a long time since you were so happy Sirius. What will happen to you now I wonder? We never even told Dumbledore about the plan. Will you survive? Will you kill the traitor? Will you spend the rest of your life trying to convince those that matter of the truth?

_Hey James! _

What, Sirius?

_What do you do… _

"Avada Kedavra,"

_You duck James _

Too late


End file.
